Last Spring, I decided to "pull-up my bootstrapps" and go back to school. It was hard, but I knew I could do it! More than anything, I wanted to prove to myself that I could do it! I was scared and felt weak and small. I found a few classes that I could take online and decided to give it a try. Not only did I accomplish my goals, I was able to get straight "A's"! I honestly didn't know I had it in me! It was a proud day in my life when Ashley came home with questions about her algebra homework and I could actually help her!
Life gets challenging as your kids grow up...I always looked forward to having my babies grow up so I could have a little time to sew or practice the piano or cook. I've learned that life gets extremely busy when your children get older, and that they need you more than ever to be there for them.
A few weeks ago, I signed up for Chemistry and Psychology. Both of these classes were on campus and my Chemistry class/lab was every weekday, except for Thursdays. I was overwhelmed but kept telling myself that I could do it! Last week, I didn't have homework due to an exam and spent time enjoying my kids and felt myself longing to be with them. I guess it was a bit of an eye opener to have Aylexie turn 12 and go into Young Women's...I felt torn...I wanted to complete my goals, yet I felt like I was missing out on precious moments in my kids lives. I made a difficult decission to put school on hold for now and enjoy the beauty of being a mother. School will always be there...but my children will grow up too fast.
I feel at peace with my decision and feel happier than I have felt in a long time. I'm going to spend more time enjoying "the now" and not stressing or worrying about "what needs to be done". Today, I pulled out an embroidery quilt that I started last January...it was SO nice to be able to actually ENJOY something that I love to do, instead of rushing through it!
I know I learned a lot and gained a lot of important skills this past year and look forward to stepping back onto campus later...when my kids don't need me as much as they do now...and realize that I need them too!
5 comments:
that is so true in all our phases of life. i constantly try to remind myself to enjoy the "now." i guess it never changes!!! enjoy your crafts again:)
Way to go Connie! I know what a hard decision that must have been for you. You are always an inspiration to me.
Those are tough decisions to make--but when you feel that undeniable peaceful feeling, you know you made the right one! Love and Miss you!
I could tell today that you had a huge weight lifted from your shoulders...already much happier!
You know I'm proud of you! Enjoy this time with your kids and Jeff!
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